Mark E. Smith And The Meaning Of Wildlife

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Back when I was a rabid fan of The Fall, I never imagined a day when I would read an article about Mark E. Smith’s murderous hatred of squirrels. Are they spoilt Victorian squirrels? And does he hit ’em over the head with a 2×4? So many fan questions remain unanswered by the AFP report.

The most important tidbit we learn is that, according to Mr. Smith, “Squirrels mean nothing to me.” With this in mind, I need to pull out all 498 of my Fall albums and listen through them yet again. This time, searching for clues about the development of his cryptic philosophy regarding the meaning of squirrels.

As for the RSPCA, good luck with your efforts to silence Smith. No one’s been able to do that for the past 30 years. Also be aware that “R.S.P.C.A.” is exactly the sort of title he gives to his obscure and often vitriolic songs.

Now where did I put my pellet gun? It’s springtime here in Virginia and these songbirds are about to drive me CRAZY!

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